Would Adultery Be A Deal Breaker For Your Marriage?
Many couples may have a knee jerk response to that question and answer “yes” that adultery would indeed destroy their marriage.
But would it? Or, indeed should it?
Infidelity is a pain that all couples hope their marriage will never experience, but since adultery is one of the leading causes of divorce, it is obvious that many marriages do indeed go through this gut wrenching injury to their union.
The question is how to deal with the aftermath of the revelation of adultery.
The spouse having the affair is sometimes reluctant to divulge the details of the adulterous affair and oftentimes just wants to sweep the whole episode under the rug and move on TOGETHER as if nothing has happened.
However, in a great many cases of adultery this is the complete opposite of what the offended spouse wants.
Anyway you look at it; being unfaithful is going to impact your marriage negatively and the spouse who committed the adultery will have to make amends if they want to save the marriage.
The injured spouse will set the tone for what is required to make them feel special, valued and secure again in the marriage.
Apart from the death of a child or a spouse, adultery is without doubt the biggest and most heart wrenching challenges of any marriage.
So, staying in the relationship and rebuilding it will take courage, forgiveness, honest communication and loving commitment.
One of the first things the injured spouse will need from the adulterer is a heartfelt and convincing, “I ‘m sorry”!
Adultery is a shocking insult and betrayal to both the injured party and the marriage itself.
However, if both spouses want to continue in the marriage they will have to be open and honest about what they are feeling.
There will be a lot of anger, pain, shame and loss of trust after adultery enters a marriage.
There will also be many questions such as “Why did the affair happen in the first place?”
After the initial devastation of discovering the adultery the partners may want some time apart to examine how they feel about the marriage and decide if they want to prevent adultery from becoming a deal breaker for them.
Remember there are three components to your marriage, you as individuals, you and your spouse as a couple and then there is the dynamics of the relationship that you have created inside the union.
To avoid adultery becoming a deal breaker in your marriage healing will have to take place in all three parts of the marriage.
- The partner being cheated on will need to be made to feel safe and secure in the marriage again.
- The offending partner will have to work hard to re-establish the trust that they breached by having the affair.
- The marriage itself will undoubtedly experience a massive overhaul and examination as the couple work together to rebuild or recreate the intimacy that was destroyed.
Finding out that your spouse has or is having an affair will be one of the most challenging events of your marriage, but does it have to end it?
Only you can decide!
However, if you do decide to fight for your marriage you can get help right now and survive the affair.
Learn how to restore the trust and save your marriage from divorce.
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