In the beginning it was a lot like a fairy tale. You met your Prince Charming. You fell in love with him and he fell in love with you. It was a whirlwind courtship and you believed you both on your way to the storybook wedding you’d always dreamed of. Then, reality set in and happily ever after suddenly doesn’t seem quite so certain.
You both still love each other. There’s no doubt about that at all. In fact, love is the least of your worries. There’s plenty of it to go around. The passion is still smoking hot too. A little too hot – at least when passions are high in the process of disagreeing. So, what is the problem that’s taken you off course and what can you do to get your happily ever after back on track?
Write a Different Script
Work on this script together. The problem with happily ever after is that you’ve got two separate visions of exactly what that means coming into the picture – both of those visions are more than little bit unrealistic too. It’s time for the two of you to have a long talk about what you expect from each other, what you’d like to get out of the relationship, and how you’d like to be treated.
Figure out which things you really need in a relationship, which things you’d like to have in a relationship but can be relatively happy without, and which things you can live without – provided that all your needs and some of your “wants” are being taken care of.
Decide on these things together and see how differently happily ever after turns out to be for both of you. Just make sure that you’re both doing a little bit of giving and taking in the rewrite process.
Go for a Chance of Scenery
Sometimes, having the same old fights, discussions, arguments, and “make up” scenes in the same place can have a negative impact on the relationship. After a while it begins to feel like a repeat performance and a never-ending cycle.
It’s time to break the cycle and get out of the rut. Something as simple as a change of scenery can often do the trick. When things start getting out of hand or you feel like you’re beginning to lose a little of the spark and sizzle your relationship has always had before, then it’s time to plan a little trip out of town.
I know budgets are tight these days and every penny counts. The last thing you want to do is add money problems on top of other contentious issues so start a little “get away” fund that you both contribute a small amount of money to each and every week.
If you both put $10 into the jar every week, it won’t take long to have enough money for a weekend out of town. If you can hang on a little longer you should be able to manage a long weekend or a short vacation. The goal is to have funds available to travel when needed for the sake of recharging your relationship, after all.